Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts

Monday, April 22, 2013

45 Life Lessons, written by a 90 year old


1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short not to enjoy it.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.
5. Don’t buy stuff you don’t need.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for things that matter.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye… But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful.  Clutter weighs you down in many ways.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to be happy.  But it’s all up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words, ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose Life.
28. Forgive but don’t forget.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give Time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d
grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. Accept what you already have, not what you think you need.
42. The best is yet to come…
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.


**This list has been going around the interwebz for a while so I couldn't trace its origins, although Regina Brett's blog below does look like the source.**

kthanxbai!

http://jumblerant.blogspot.com
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Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Summer 2012 - A Disaster Ahead

With the Middle East in turmoil, Colonel Gaddafi running away, Turkey attacking the Kurds with helicopters and Israel with diplomacy, London's Burning (and not the TV show!) and Greece is about to slide down t bankruptcy, I can already foresee next summer's disaster.


And may God have mercy on our souls.

kthanxbai!
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Sunday, April 25, 2010

Higher Still?

Just in case you thought my mind had gone all serious and nice after my last few posts, here is a rather evil joke I picked up from Tanker over at Mostly Cajun, All American and Opinionated:

Obama in Heaven

Obama dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates. He is very excited; all his life he’s had a secret wish and longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.
Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, Barack meets a man with a beard. ‘Are you Mohammed?’ he asks.

‘No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up.’ Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.

Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, Obama climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds coming to a room where he meets another bearded man. He asks again, ‘Are you Mohammed?’

President George W. Bush and President-elect B...‘No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher still.’
Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy, he climbs the ladder; yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard. Full of hope, he asks again, ‘Are you Mohammed?’ ‘No, I am Jesus… You will find Mohammed higher up.’
Mohammed higher than Jesus! Man!
Obama can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher. Once again, he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question: ‘Are you Mohammed?’ he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath from all his climbing.

‘No, my son…. I am Almighty God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a cup of coffee..?’

‘Yes! Please, my Lord,’ Obama exclaims.

God looks behind him, claps his hands and yells out: ‘Hey Mohammed — two coffees!’
 (From a particularly evil email)

kthanxbai!