Jumblerant

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Jay G - keeping the iPad real

'Twas a mere couple of days ago that I celebrated the iPad's astoundingicityness, here, on this very blog 'iPad is High Quality', and yet His Eminence the Jay G of MArooned sees it differently.

kthanxbai!

P.S. Jay - I'm not saying you're wrong, but lets settle this with my Tavor against your VERP. Just a case of getting it all through customs I guess.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Distance from bias? Myas

I read a few blogs every day - maybe a 100, maybe 500 - depends on the wife, work and if the latest episode of 'Pineapple Dance Studios' is downloaded.

Louis from Pineapple Dance Studios

So now to the title of the blog - Reuters. And Hamas. A lovely couple.

Hamas was upset at an on-line ad that was seen at the Reuters Arabic service site, offering a $10 million reward for information on the whereabouts of Gilad Shalit.

Reuters' response to the terrorist group is instructive.

Palestine Today reports that Reuters responded to the criticism, saying that it was an automated ad placed there by Google Ads, and not - Allah forbid! - placed by any Reuters staffers. After all, an ad that seeks to free a prisoner illegally held in an unknown location without any access to the Red Cross would be thoroughly offensive to any Reuters employee, right?

Reuters then cravenly added that they immediately acted to remove the ad, and "we are now taking steps to ensure non-recurrence of such things in the future."

Reuters additionally wrote back to the offended terrorist organization that Reuters has a long history of covering the Middle East in a neutral and accurate manner, stressing that they are committed to continuing this approach, they wrote "We are clear and faithful to our principles of integrity, independence and distance from bias."

My response to Reuters? - "Distance from bias? Myass"

Hat tip to Elder of Ziyon

kthanxbai!

People ask me why I blog and I really don't have a valid answer. And then I find an amazing true story like the one over at Nobody Asked Me and I realise just what it is that keeps me sharing and caring on the interwebs.

Its a story I've never heard before about a POW in Vietnam, how he got there and how he got out. Here is a short excerpt from the tale;

In trying to get people to accept early propaganda releases, the Communists would have some "good cop" interrogator like the ones we called the "Soft Soap Fairy" talk to the prospect and sound him out for pliability. They got Doug one day and asked what we eventually learned to be the lead question: "What do you want more than anything else in the world?" The answer of the weak and willing was : "To go home to my family." Doug thought for a long time, then cocked his head with a smile and said "Why, I'd like a pillow, Sir." This was not an unreasonable response since we had no pillows on our cement pads or bed boards. However, the response sure confounded the enemy. They eventually came up with a name for Doug amongst the guards and interrogators: "The Incredibly Stupid One." His original resistance ploy had paid off.

Because they thought him stupid, they would let him go out in the cell block courtyard during the siesta to sweep up the grounds period monitored by only one sleepy, peasant guard. I thought that was great since it kept him from skipping and I could get some rest. However, curiosity got the better of me and I started to watch him through a peephole we had bored in the cell door. He'd go sweeping and humming until the guard was lulled to sleep. Then Doug would back up to a truck, spin the gas cap off the standpipe, stoop down and put a small amount ("Small, because it's going to be a long war, Sir.") of dirt in the gas tank and replace the cap. I watched him over a period of time do this to five trucks.

Now, I'm a liberal arts major who shot himself down, so all I can do is report what I saw. There were five trucks working in the prison; I saw Doug work on five trucks; I saw five trucks towed disabled out of the prison camp. Doug Hegdahl, a high school graduate from the mess decks fell off a ship and has five enemy trucks to his credit. I am a World Famous Golden Dragon (VA 192) with two college degrees, 2000 jet hours, 300 carrier landings and 22 combat missions. How many enemy trucks do I have to my credit? Zero. Zip. Nada. De Rien. 0. Who's the better man? Douglas Brent Hegdahl, one of two men I know of who destroyed enemy military equipment while a prisoner of war.

So go here and read the whole story. And tell the Old NFO that Jumblerant sent you.

kthanxbai!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

iPad is high quality

How would you show that the iPad is the highest quality machine ever built? Get a world renowned pianist to play something on it. In public.

Real or fake? What do you think??

kthanxbai!

Saturday, May 1, 2010

No Free Lunch

I unashamedly stole this, verbatim, from the excellent, and highly recommended blog The Sandgram

Got this from a friend of mine whose son is about to become a 2ndLt in the Marines. John, thanks for the piece, I tend to stay away from politics, but this is too good!!

I was in my neighborhood restaurant this morning and was seated behind a group of jubilant individuals celebrating the successful passing of the recent health care bill.

Public domain image from cancer.gov http://vis...

GLENSIDE, PA - MARCH 08: President Barack Oba...

I could not finish my breakfast.
This is what ensued:

They were a diverse group of several races and both sexes.
I heard the young man exclaim, “Isn’t Obama like Jesus Christ?
I mean, after all, he is healing the sick”.
The young woman enthusiastically proclaimed, “Yeah, and he does it for free.
I cannot believe anyone would think that a free market would work for health care.
They are all crooks and thieves and don’t deserve all of that money.”
Another said, ‘The stupid Republicans want us all to starve to death so they can inherit all of the power.
Obama should be made a saint for what he did for those of us less fortunate.”
At this, I had had enough.

I arose from my seat, mustering all the restraint I could find, and approached their table.
“Please excuse me; may I impose upon you for one moment?
”They smiled and welcomed me to the conversation.
I stood at the end of their table, smiled as best I could and began an experiment.

“I would like to give one of you my house.
It will cost you no money and I will pay all of the expenses and taxes for as long as you live there.
Anyone interested?” They looked at each other in astonishment.
“Why would you do something like that?” asked a young man, “There isn’t anything for free in this world”.
They began to laugh at me, as they did not realize this man had just made my point.
“I am serious, I will give you my house for free, no money what so ever. Anyone interested?”
In unison, a resounding” Hell Yeah” fills the room.

“Since there are too many of you, I will have to make a choice as to who receives this money free bargain.”
I noticed an elderly couple was paying attention to the spectacle unfolding before their eyes, the old man shaking
his head in apparent disgust.
“I tell you what; I will give it to the one of you most willing to obey my rules.”
Again, they looked at one another, an expression of bewilderment on their faces.
The perky young woman asked, “What are the rules?” I smiled and said, “I don’t know.
I have not yet defined them.
However, it is a free home that I offer you.”
They giggled amongst themselves, the youngest of which said, “What an old coot.
He must be crazy to give away his home.
Go take your meds, old man.”
I smiled and leaned into the table a bit further.
I am serious, this is a legitimate offer.
They gaped at me for a moment.

Hell, I’ll take it you old fool.
Where are the keys?” boasted the youngest among them.
Then I presume you accept ALL of my terms then? I asked.
The elderly couple seemed amused and entertained as they watched from the privacy of their table.
“Oh hell yeah! Where do I sign up?”
I took a napkin and wrote, “I give this man my home, without the burden of financial obligation, so long as he accepts and abides by the terms that I shall set forth upon consummation of this transaction.”
I signed it and handed it to the young man who eagerly scratched out his signature.
“Where are the keys to my new house?” he asked in a mocking tone of voice.
All eyes were upon us as I stepped back from the table, pulling the keys from pocket and dangling them before the excited new homeowner.

Now that we have entered into this binding contract, witnessed by all of your friends, I have decided upon the conditions you are obligated to adhere from this point forward.
You may only live in the house for one hour a day.
You will not use anything inside of the home.
You will obey me without question or resistance.
I expect complete loyalty and admiration for this gift I bestow upon you.
You will accept my commands and wishes with enthusiasm, no matter the nature.
Your morals and principles shall be as mine.
You will vote as I do, think as I do and do it with blind faith.
These are my terms.
Here are your keys.” I reached the keys forward and the young man looked at me dumb founded.

Are you out of your freaking mind? Who would ever agree to those ridiculous terms?” the young man appeared irritated. You did when you signed this contract before reading it, understanding it and with the full knowledge that I would provide my conditions only after you committed to the agreement.
Was all I said. The elderly man chuckled as his wife tried to restrain him.
I was looking at a now silenced and bewildered group of people.
You can shove that stupid deal up you’re a** old man, I want no part of it exclaimed the now infuriated young man.
You have committed to the contract, as witnessed by all of your friends; you cannot get out of the deal unless I agree to it.
I do not intend to let you free now that I have you ensnared.
I am the power you agreed to.
I am the one you blindly and without thought chose to enslave yourself to.
In short, I am your Master. At this, the table of celebrating individuals became a unified group against the unfairness of the deal.

After a few moments of unrepeatable comments and slurs, I revealed my true intent.
What I did to you is what this administration and congress did to you with the health care legislation.
I easily suckered you in and then revealed the real cost of the bargain.
Your folly was in the belief that you can have something you did not earn; that you are entitled to that which you did not earn; that you willingly allowed someone else to think for you.
Your failure to research, study and inform yourself permitted reason to escape you.
You have entered into a trap from which you cannot flee.
Your only chance of freedom is if your new Master gives it unto you.
A freedom that is given can also be taken away; therefore, it is not freedom.
With that, I tore up the napkin and placed it before the astonished young man.
This is the nature of your new health care legislation.”

I turned away to leave these few in thought and contemplation and was surprised by applause.
The elderly gentleman, who was clearly entertained, shook my hand enthusiastically and said, Thank you Sir, these kids don’t understand Liberty these days.
He refused to allow me to pay my bill as he said, You earned this one, it is an honor to pickup the tab.
I shook his hand in thanks, leaving the restaurant somewhat humbled, and sensing a glimmer of hope for my beloved country.

kthanxbai!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Parking Frius

The truth of the matter is that I don't like Priuses - or is it Priuii? Either way I they rile me up.

I don't know if its their arrogant design or their drivers' smarmy look when they are overtaken, I just don't know.

Toyota Prius of the Imperial Guard patorols th...

I'm fine with Honda's Civic half battery and half petrol engine car. I'm even looking forward to owning a battery powered Land Rover Discovery one time in the (very, very) distant future. Looking at the Prius just makes me clench my fist in preparation for smashing someone in the nose

Unlike some bloggers I know, I do, however, frown on peeing on the door handles of ANY vehicle!

My wife doesn't like me to swear, especially when I'm driving, so I try not to. But those Priuses do test me.

So I came up with an idea.

Very simple.

I'll convince the wife that my swearing is actually something else, so here goes;

The process that Priuses / Prii use to turn their movement into battery power and then back into
car movement? Well it was named after Proffessor Fark of Hinkyflinky, Sweden. The process that is named after him is called farking.

So now, whenever I pass a Prius, I say in an amicable, cheery voice, "look there's a farking Prius'.

And everyone smiles.

kthanxbai!

Sunday, April 25, 2010

The Pacific is Suckypoo

Just in case you were wondering, I am up to episode 6 of Tom Hanks' "The Pacific" and I still think it sucks big time.

Yes, Band of Brothers would be danged hard to follow but this is, and I don't use the term lightly, "Suckypoo".

I just hope that the book is better.

I continue to watch Pacific because I feel that ought to but really, it feels like I'm watching an exceptionally crappy soap opera. Is it better than nothing? I just don't know. What do you think?

As I said in my earlier review, "Pacific Disappointment" the best book for understanding an iota of what the Marines went through in the Pacific is to read the book "With The Old Breed" by Eugene Sledge.

kthanxbai!

Higher Still?

Just in case you thought my mind had gone all serious and nice after my last few posts, here is a rather evil joke I picked up from Tanker over at Mostly Cajun, All American and Opinionated:

Obama in Heaven

Obama dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates. He is very excited; all his life he’s had a secret wish and longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.

Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, Barack meets a man with a beard. ‘Are you Mohammed?’ he asks.

‘No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up.’ Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.

Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, Obama climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds coming to a room where he meets another bearded man. He asks again, ‘Are you Mohammed?’

‘No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher still.’

Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy, he climbs the ladder; yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard. Full of hope, he asks again, ‘Are you Mohammed?’ ‘No, I am Jesus… You will find Mohammed higher up.’
Mohammed higher than Jesus! Man!
Obama can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher. Once again, he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question: ‘Are you Mohammed?’ he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath from all his climbing.

‘No, my son…. I am Almighty God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a cup of coffee..?’

‘Yes! Please, my Lord,’ Obama exclaims.

God looks behind him, claps his hands and yells out: ‘Hey Mohammed — two coffees!’

(From a particularly evil email)

kthanxbai!

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Bandwidth Theft

When I put up a picture here on Blogger, Blogger pays for the server for the amount of data stored.

If I were to use a private server then I would pay for any picture / data stored on it.

A picture such as the above would not cut into the maximum bandwidth allowed but over time, and as more people direct other readers to it, the costs add up. So how annoyed should a blogger be when someone hosts their image (bandwidth) on another site without permission? Neptunus Lex shares with us how annoyed he got and what he did about it.

A brief photo essay on the perils of hotlinking other people’s digital imagery rather than hosting your own.

Before:

After:

Here endeth the lesson.

I'm sure the Saudi Arabian forum that stole the picture from him quickly heard about their mistake!!

kthanxbai!

Friday, April 23, 2010

Fed Up With Being Bashed About

I don't like bullies. I don't like liars. I really don't like being on the receiving end from either. Shocking really.
Someone who also doesn't like being rallied against is Amy. She received abuse from a friend of a friend on Facebook and decided to fight back on her husband's blog 'Fighting for Liberty'.

Some quotes from her essay:

In the late 1800s, some Jews began looking for a solution to the violent Judeophobia (I prefer this term to “anti-Semitism”) in Europe that they had been enduring for centuries. (Concise timelines of Judeophobia are here and here.) It was obvious to people like Theodor Herzl that the Jews needed their own land where they would no longer be persecuted. (Examples of brutal, racist treatment can be seen here and here.) Jews bought more land in Palestine (whenever possible – many Palestinians refused to sell land to Jews), and Russian Jews immigrated there to flee the waves of pogroms, increasing the Jewish presence in Palestine, even before the British issued the Balfour Declaration in 1917. However, the British also promised the land to the Arabs, and had separately made a deal with France to make Palestine internationally controlled. The Arabs revolted against the British (killing Jews as well, just for good measure) in 1936. Although the Arabs weren’t successful in kicking out non-Arabs, this revolt started some cultural shifts – namely, increased hostilities between Arabs and Jews (two groups whose ancient histories had been intertwined in this area for thousands of years), and Britain revoked their promise to give land in Palestine to the Jews.

You say the Israelis are brutal and racist. However, I think you are seeing only the ugliness of war on one side. It is ugly on both sides. The Israelis did not start the war. On May 15, 1948, just one day after the independent state of Israel was created, six Arab nations declared war on Israel. The war could have been avoided if the Palestinians had agreed to the U.N.-proposed two-state proposal. And still, the war could end at any time if they would agree to a two-state proposal.

Well done Amy! For the rest of the essay click here

kthanxbai!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Hitting The Capitalist Nail On The Head

I like Capitalism.

Its a good 'ism'.

If you sell me a product I like at a price I like, then I'll come back for more. You'll make money and everyone is happy.

I like it. Black and white, no shades of grey, does the job and everyone is happy.

So why is it so infrequent that we get to see signs like this around the planet?

Kudos to Five Guys Burgers and Fries. And a hat-tip to Sharp as a Marble.

kthanxbai!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I Should Not Be Here

I should not be here.

I should be drinking tea and eating scones with my Mum in good old Blighty.

But that Eyjafjallajokull volcano has scuppered all our plans.

But it really is quite beautiful isn't it?

In a deeper sense I think it should open our eyes on just how reliant we are today on certain machines, and how nature can play with our daily lives.

kthanxbai!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Thar be pirates - oooh aar

I have an MP3 player, I have an iTouch, my wife has an MP3 player and we were seriously considering getting one for our 13 month old baby.

The truth of the matter is that I have not actually bought a CD or music online for years. Maybe 5 years. All of the music I have on either of my digital music players is from discs I bought in the beginning of the century or stuff I downloaded of the interweb in the last year or two.

Have I caused the downfall of the music industry? Probably..... not. Have you and i together created a huge vacuum where their bank balances used to be? Highly unlikely.

What is the real effect of piracy on the music industry, a world wide business of over $60 BILLION a year??

Oddee has the answer - go there, or here, or here, to find out the who's, whats, whys and wherefore of piracy's effect on the music industry.

kthanxbai!

Sunday, April 11, 2010

The Polish tragedy

In case you weren't sure just how much of a disaster Poland went through when their President's plane went down yesterday, here is a who's who of those on the plane.

There were no survivors.

Lech Kaczyński, President

{{pl|Prezydent Rzeczpospolitej Polski Lech Kac...

Maria Kaczyńska, First Lady

Ryszard Kaczorowski, last President-in-exile

Krzysztof Putra, vice-Marshal of the Sejm (speaker of Parliament)

Krystyna Bochenek, vice-Marshal of the Sejm

Jerzy Szmajdziński, former Minister of Defence and intended Presidential Candidate for this year’s election

Władysław Stasiak, chief of the President’s office

Jacek Sasin, deputy chief of the President’s office

Aleksander Szczygło, chief of National Security Bureau

Paweł Wypych, Secretary of State in President’s office

Mariusz Handzlik, deputy Secretary of State in President’s office

Andrzej Kremer, vice-minister of Foreign Affairs

General Franciszek Gągor, Chief of Staff

Jerzy Bar, ambassador to Russia

Andrzej Przewoźnik, major historian

Maciej Płażyński, MP, former Marshal of the Sejm

Przemysław Gosiewski, MP, former minister

Zbigniew Wassermann, MP, former minister

Izabela Jaruga-Nowacka, MP, former Minister of Social Policy

Jolanta Szymanek-Deresz, MP, former chief of President’s Office

Aleksandra Natalii-Świat, MP, vice-president of Law and Justice party

Leszek Deptuła, MP

Grażyna Gęsicka, MP

Arkadiusz Rybicki, MP

Stanisław Zając, MP

Edward Wojtas, MP

Wiesław Woda, MP

Sebastian Karpiniuk, MP

Grzegorz Dolniak, MP

Janusz Kochanowski, Ombudsman

Sławomir Skrzypek, President of the Polish National Bank

Janusz Kurtyka, President of the Institute of National Remembrance (state institution for historical research)

Bishop Tadeusz Płoski

and the chiefs of every arm of the Armed Forces.

kthanxbai!

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Mr. Deal's Easter by crankylitprof

If you ever wondered what English Literature Professors did in their spare time, read on:

They lived together in the same gray with green trim Victorian house for sixty-some odd years; he carried her over the threshold after their wedding reception. Money was too tight for an actual honeymoon, but both were thankful to have their own place, more so because all they really felt they needed was each other. The beautiful house was just gravy (though Mrs. Deal kept that house like it was Imperial jade, turning carpets, washing walls, changing drapes for each season and polishing all the wood with beeswax).

The town grew around them, cars became more prevalent. Eventually, the street was paved, and actual stop signs — and a traffic light! — were erected. They drove the same perfectly-maintained-by-the-Mister beige Packard that he had bought with his Army muster-out pay in the late fifties.

Read the complete, moving, story here

kthanxbai!

Friday, April 9, 2010

Mazel Tov to doubletapper

Doubletapper has been voted 'Best Foreign National Military Blog' at milbloggiong.com
Considering the competition for the position and the fact that there was only 1 foreign blog winner - he did done good!

Israeli military police women stand in formati...

Obviously, the fact that he shows many pictures of gorgeous IDF female soldiers in uniform, and with their rifles, in no way influenced the judges.

kthanxbai!

Thursday, April 8, 2010

I'm meant to be the one ranting

The idea of this blog is to bring you, the gentle and highly intelligent genius that you are, a few of the interesting things I find out there on the interweb.

Tanker over at Mostly Cajun, All American and Opinionated, has this juicy rant about, guess what? Yeah, 'kids today'. Have fun!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning…. Uphill… Barefoot… BOTH ways… yadda, yadda, yadda....

And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don’t know how good you’ve got it! ....

There were no MP3’s or Napsters or iTunes! If you wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself!...
Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio, and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning...

The whole outrageous rant is here.

kthanxbai!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

iBonkers

The iPad was released just a short time ago but already there are blinking nutters who are doing weird and wonderful things with them:

kthanxbai!

Friday, April 2, 2010

Four White Cops, One Angry Black Man

Sounds like a joke or a beginning of a cheesy detective novel?

Its actually another great blog from His Eminence the Ambulance Driver over at his blog, A Day In The Life Of An Ambulance Driver:

Four White Cops, One Angry Black Man

… and the angry black man was high on drugs and emotionally despondent over the inability to kick his addiction.

And the incident ended not with gunfire, or with the black man writhing on the ground at the end of a Taser, but with the angry black man walking to the ambulance and climbing aboard, of his own free will. The EMTs bandaged the man’s lacerated wrists as he sobbed brokenly, and the cops quietly assured him that they were there to help, not arrest, and that they’d do whatever it took to get the angry black man the help he needed.

And when the angry black man thanked one of the white cops for treating him like a man and a fellow human being, and begged him to accompany him to the hospital, the white cop promised that he’d follow right behind the ambulance, and he’d be there with him in the ER as he went through what was undoubtedly a very frightening time for the angry black man.
He delivered on his promise, too.

That’s how the majority of these encounters go, you know. Doesn’t matter if the cops are white and the angry man is black, or vice versa. With a little compassion and a lot of communication, the vast majority of such incidents end without harm or bloodshed. I see them play out this way every day.

I tell you this story not because it is unusual, but because it isn’t.

You know, just in case you got the opposite impression from what you always see in the news.

Having seen this exact situation pan out time and time again I thought I'd spread the word.

kthanxbai!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

You want funny?

You want funny? You can't handle the funny.

As they say over at 'Throw The Ball Already' - this is the funniest beer commercial ever.

Enjoy.

kthanxbai!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

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